once more with feeling

‘So, why did you never reply to my text message from new year’s?’ The cellphone in her hand, she’s standing there, speechless. Why now? After all those months? What does he want this time?

She met him at work. Before she saw him for the first time at a meeting, she always thought he was this arrogant, young boy, probably not very attractive, one of those who always have to put their two cents in, who always think they know everything better. But he was cute, and after some more e-mails she even considered him as quite funny and interesting.
One Friday, just before she left work, he asked her if she wanted to join him and a friend for some going out. She felt this was a little bit too weird, considering that she had to work with him every day. So she texted him later saying that she was not in the mood, but maybe some other time. And that ‘other time’ was already the next day. She couldn’t resist, he was too cute and also she needed to get out of the flat in which she was still living with her ex.
This is how their story started. It didn’t take very long until they were officially a couple, and their relationship was a constant alternation of highs and lows. The break-up was foreseeable, but nobody knew at that point that their story would go on for way longer.

The first time they met again was probably half a year after the break-up. Somehow seeing each other, spending time together, talking – it was comforting for both of them. Even though they had their problems in the relationship, they always shared a lot, they understood each other like nobody else could, they were able to see right through the other person and understand.
Their attempt to just be friends ended twice in a terrible discussion, in anger, curses, smashing doors and tears. Then the text message at new year’s, where he told her that whatever happened, he was still thankful for all the good times they had. She didn’t reply, she was convinced that this time, she wouldn’t agree to go through all of this again. A couple of months later, she did. Somehow your mind always manages to put aside the bad memories and just call forth the good ones, did you ever notice that? Still, always again there are moments when she has to remind herself that she was in love with him, or had once been in love with him, a long time ago. Maybe they just expect the other person to always be there, a resource to call upon at any time like the emergency services. And until now, this proved to work.
However, the end of their story has yet to be written. If there’s ever gonna be one.

This little story might be true and might not be. It might also be partially true. It has been inspired by the book I just finished: One Day by David Nicholls. It’s probably the best and most intense book I’ve ever read. It is about two people who fall in and out of love, who try and fail in friendship, who keep touch and break tie. Nicholls looks at the same day for 20 years: July 15. I could spoil a bit more of the story, but I’d rather recommend you to just give it a try and read it.

‘What’s up?’ he asked.
‘Nothing. Oh, nothing. Just…’ She looked up at him. ‘I thought I’d finally got rid of you.’
‘I don’t think you can.’ he said.

As a soundtrack for your reading, I highly recommend the new Beirut record ‘The Rip Tide’. The songs give you this warm, nostalgic feeling with their swooning sounds, Zach Condon’s unique voice and his compelling lyrics. The record hasn’t been released yet (and I will not tell you to get it illegally even if that’s already possible, but shhh!), but many of the songs are already on YouTube. Like this one.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j5Tv9MI9WNk